The van on the right was blocking the van on the left from getting over. At one point, the blocking driver rolled down his window, screamed at the top of his lungs and flipped off the other driver, throwing the bird up so forcefully you'd think he was plugging it into the sky for something to come out in return.
Gina Benkendorf
The frazzled driver on the left (we will call him a victim just about to miss his turn) took the basic attitude of: "OK, I get that you're an a** and you're not going to let me over, but I need to get off this highway. Why are you making this difficult for me?"
Next thing you know, the madman swerves into the victim's lane, basically running him off the road.
Our victim tries to signal the immediate need to get over as Route 3 turns into 46. But PO'd man swerves again, yelling.
Then -- are you ready for this? -- he chucks a full large cup of "America Runs on Dunkin" out his window at the victim, who has now missed his turn.
You might be thinking, "Are you kidding? This happens all the time. That's nothing. I've seen worse."
But what was really going on here?
What if one of these guys had a gun? Is the potential cost worth this much energy to be ahead of a single car in a line that stretches for miles?
Call it "The Golden Rule," reaping what you sow, karma, whatever you wish.
But there is a universal principle at work in these situations: What comes around goes around. It may not have come for the PO'd driver here, but if that's how he goes through life, trust me, someone bigger will express their displeasure in a way that could leave him hospitalized -- or worse.
What's most tragic is that, as we enter the holiday season, he missed an opportunity.
Treat others how you want to be treated, give others what YOU desire -- through small kindnesses that you can't buy on a shelf -- and it will come back to you tenfold.
Money's tight this year, and you might not be able to drop off that extra present. Or you might feel ashamed that you can't spare change for the bell ringer outside the department store.
But you can give something that costs nothing -- a smile. And you can keep giving it until someone gives it back.
What if you let one person -- or even 2 or 3 -- go ahead of you? Will it make that much of a difference in where you'll end up and when? Or is there something else at work here?
It's funny: The PO'd van driver is probably the first one to ask: "Why doesn't the world smile anymore?"
"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" is the highest form of behavior we are capable of.
Or: "What thou avoidest suffering thyself seek not to impose on others." – Epictetus.
Before you "lose it" on the road, or at the mall, or on the street, answer honestly: Is sorrow or pain desirable to you?
You're lying if you say yes.
Just as you don't want sorrow or pain, neither do any of our fellow humans -- who all breathe, exist and live in the same world we do.
What if we take December to try out a farming experiment: Sow seeds of love and kindness. Then and reap the harvest!
A Southern belle who has found her place amid the bustle of our area, Gina G. Benkendorf helps others obtain " prashanti" -- supreme peace. Her yoga instruction emphasizes not only flexibility and balance but also the ability to breathe, releasing the natural chemicals that can take you somewhere without noisy helicopters, incessant deadlines or backed-up arteries -- whether you're talking River Road or your body. Besides working as a local and non-local Specialized Yoga Instructor at At East Coast Fitness (Edgewater), Shiva Shanti (Rutherford), Kids Yoga (Weehawken), and Prana Yoga Studio (Denville), Gina welcomes private clients. You can contact her at: This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it
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Johnny DeCarlo
said:
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... The holiday season is certainly supposed to bring us all closer and we should all try and be more civil to each other this time of year but....for some folks it's a very stressful time (especially when trying to navigate through traffic to the mall, and then, yes, battling for that parking spot in the mall.) Geez, nobody should be flinging coffee out the window though! That's a bit rough lol |
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