MTV and 'Jersey Shore' guidos gone wild: Madonn!

Yo, Cliffside Post: Y'hear about these so-called "Italian-Americans" who got agita over the "Jersey Shore" show on MTV next week? Not for nothin', but if I was one of these mamalukes, I'd drop the subject entirely before somebody ends up goin' to slip and fall school, if y'know what I'm sayin'.

MTV

These mooks are just jealous. They wish they had guns like some of the cugines on MTV's "Jersey Shore," or a pair of how-ya-doin's like the babes (this one chick -- madonn! No way they're real).

I mean, are they really ITALIAN-American, or were they born here? Makes a big difference. Me, I'm an American of Italian heritage. Siciliana, in fact. Proud of it, too.

So proud that I laugh at the jokes. Cause that's what they are: jokes (Unless you call me a guinea. Then you're pickin' up your teeth with broken fingers. Glad we got that straight).

I once worked for a guy from Brooklyn who refused to watch "The Sopranos" because he said they (what's the word?) perpetuated negative stereotypes about our tribe (grazie, Google).

This is a guy who giggled like a schoolgirl and looked like Stanley Tucci if you'd hit him in the face with a shovel. Talk about a negative stereotype!

Whatever happened to just not watching the program? I mean, who doesn't know that reality shows on M(oron)TV all suck? You could give me 57 cracks at it and I couldn't tell you what station to hit on the remote. 69? LOL!!!

You know some of the worst things to happen to American-Italians? "The Godfather" and "Saturday Night Fever."

Too many greaseballs already had the hair, the shirts, the cars. Then these movies come out, and every zipperhead with a vowel at the end of his name is walkin' around in gold chains and black leather, tellin' people to "fuhgedabout" touchin' his hair.

Y'know what? I didn't see this bunch o' Marys complainin' when THOSE movies came out. Or when Father Guido Sarducci played "Find the Pope in the Pizza" on Saturday Night Live!

Nobody said ougats to Ed Sullivan about Topo Gigio. Or to Lou Monte about Pepino the Italian Mouse. Or to Paterson's Lou Costello about Bacciagalupe.

Francis Albert is probably rollin' over in his grave.

I got this quote off the Internet:

"We find this program alarming in that it attempts to make a direct connection between 'guido culture' and Italian-American identity," said National Italian American Foundation President Joseph Del Raso.

Oofah!

You ask me, I think MTV delivered a couple boxes of ganoles to these faccia brutes in return for a little free publicity, if y'see where I'm goin' with this.

If these momos could see me, I'd flip my fingertips under my chin: Va fa Napoli! Then I'd tell 'em to reach back and pull out the sticks.

Yours,

Tony Romo

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Johnny DeCarlo said:

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Well said. All these holier than thou activists who claim they know everything about the right way to behave as a "proper cultured Italian" (and yes, most of them are born here and are Americans of Italian heritage like us), will never stop finding some TV show to complain about. A REALITY show though? They really have nothing better to protest about??? All reality shows are silly and over-the-top and this one happens to be about the extra intense "Jersey Guido," a SUBCULTURE of the American-Italian culture (which, in itself, is a subculture of the European-Italian culture). We come in all shapes and sizes…young old, white color, blue color, actors, writers, cooks, doctors, lawyers, politicians, Jersey Shore beachgoers (haven't seen the show yet, so I can't say what these shore guidos do for jobs)....All I'm trying to say is that for every rocket scientist who strives to cure diseases, there is still that Brooklyn plumber who is content with his life and just strives to PERPETUATE his neighborhood pizzeria to help keep a fellow paisan in business. That plumber aint bothering anyone, he cares about the little things like his pizza joint. God bless. This show may suck…it may be funny…who really knows and who is UNICO to dictate what MTV airs or define a show as trash for every man, woman and child regardless of their age or ethnicity? All these shows have their demographic. I personally hate "The Hills," but it's got an audience. Is every single young person from Beverly Hills exactly how they are on that show?

Pepino the Mouse told me that season 2 of this program may offer some extra crazy fun, so be prepared (granted it's not canceled and makes it that far). In the meantime, I plan to check out season 1 of this show, if for no other reason to see if who the casting directors chose for the guys of this shore house are as charming and cool as yours truly here when I auditioned for this back in May.